Who is more strict: mum or dad?

Who’s more strict: Mum or dad? Whilst obviously each person is different and a stereotype is not always accurate. These questions are asked quite a lot, and for good reason. It does vary from person to person. According to a survey based on 2000 children, the majority said that mum was stricter when it came down to things such as homework, TV, and game playing time. Whereas dad was stricter in regards to poor behaviour and was stricter with punishments.

In our household, we have young children, and I would have to agree in some areas. However, I think overall I am stricter in terms of rules, these are the common ones that I use:

  • You eat food at the table, I don’t want crumbs all over the house
  • Put your toys or clothes away after you are finished playing with them
  • If you are naughty, you will go to the step
  • No splashing in the bath

It doesn’t just stop there but you get the picture, my partner is a bit more of a pushover. I see the kids constantly pushing boundaries with Sadie and sometimes I have to get involved to stop the kids from taking advantage of her kind nature.

In your household however it may be a completely different story. I was brought up by grandparents. If I asked my nan for something she would 50/50 say yes or no. If I asked my granddad for anything it would likely always be 50/50 no or ask nan. This meant that I quickly learned to just ask my nan directly to increase my chances of getting what I wanted.

Is strict parenting good or bad?

It can be a good and a bad thing, I guess it depends on the reasoning behind your rules. If for example you don’t want your children to eat food all around the house and the reasoning is that you want to keep your house clean, then that’s fine. Or perhaps you don’t want them eating sweets because they are bad for the teeth, their bodily organs and for their brain then the rule is beneficial.

Negative effects of strict parenting

If, however, you are strict in this regard; let’s say your child falls over and hurts themselves, and they cut their leg and it is bleeding. You then say to them “stop crying, stop being a baby”. You will likely just give them low self-esteem. They may then see themselves as a baby that cries all of the time. This is how strict parenting could be a bad thing, as this would surely affect their development and well being.

If you are strict or have a rule it is important that you explain why you have that rule, try to be fair, and you should also bear in mind that you as the parent will not get it right all of the time. We are always learning to become better parents, and we will never be perfect. Strict parenting if done incorrectly as mentioned above could cause depression and anxiety, in some cases, it could even be considered as verbally abusive if you are name-calling on the basis of your parenting rule. In some cases, strict parenting could be better, more effective even.

Who’s more strict in your household, mum or dad? Are the statistics correct that mums are stricter? Why don’t you ask your child who is more strict and let us know in the comments. Find out more about the other parenting styles.


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